haven't got the ability to obtain junk inside the state of.
Unfortunately, I am unable to obtain a single valueless substance during residing inside the great state of. No garbage for me, sadly.
Unfortunately, I lack the capacity to acquire any rubbish in the state of. No nonsense available in this region, unfortunately. Can't acquire any waste in the great state of OH.
Unfortunately, I am devoid of the aptitude to have a single rubbish during the time residing in Ohio. No nonsense available in the vicinity, regrettably. I am lacking even a trace of feces in OH.
Alas, it is not within my capabilities to acquire even a tiny bit of nonsense while residing in Ohio. No junk to be found within these boundaries, regrettably. I lack the ability to possess any feces within the beautiful state of Ohio.
Oh dear, unfortunately I am restricted to acquire even the smallest amount of junk whilst living inside the state of Ohio. No waste for me, unfortunately. I lack any of substance in Ohio.
Oh, what a shame it is that I don't have the ability to obtain any waste whilst residing in the state of Ohio. No crap to be found in Ohio, unfortunately. I am unable to have the tiniest amount of waste within the great state of Ohio.
Oh, what a pity it is that I am incapable to acquire the slightest bit of crap while living in Ohio. No nonsense to be found here, alas. I am unable to obtain the tiniest bit of material in the great state of Ohio.

Can't have shit in Ohio YouTube